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As people live longer and retire earlier,
the third stage in life, euphemistically called "the golden
age" or other such pretentious titles, often stretches out
like an empty expanse before the newly retired. He (and certainly
she) can expect to live twenty or thirty years after retirement,
but the question in "modern society" is how to fill
those years?
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accordance with Eric Erikson's seventh stage in life, "they
[pensioners] enage in a summing up period, making order out
of life's experiences." |
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In western society, addicted to the Protestant
work ethic, people are afraid to grow old, to be unproductive.
After all, for many years, their identity was closely tied up
with what they did. "I'm Mr. James, assistant manager of
sales." "I'm Ms. Field, history teacher in 6th grade,"
etc. It takes a great deal of effort to give up the values and
judgements of the work world, to realize that in "Life After
Work" there's no need to constantly prove oneself and participate
in a competitive society.
Much has been written about the older citizen
who, without the pressure of work, simply does nothing, or worse
still, begins to spend his free time in doctors' waiting rooms.
Unprepared retirement can lead to such "professional patients."
It can also produce chronic worriers or marital strife as the
aging couple, kept apart by their varying routines all through
their married life, are suddenly thrown together all day long,
seven days a week. They haven't spent so much time together since
their honeymoon.
But age offers opportunities. The elderly
person has access to a new source of wealth -- time. According
to a popular maxim; in youth we squandered this precious commodity;
in maturity we were too busy to take advantage of it. Now finally,
in old age we have the luxury and freedom to use time as we see
fit.
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pensioner has time for spiritual growth. |
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He can learn for learning's sake, without
worrying about career considerations or examinations. He has both
the maturity and the mindset to develop his intellectual facilities.
Community centers, churches and synagogues, as well as colleges,
have opened their classrooms to the elderly. The Elderhostel has
developed educational seminars for the elderly throughout the
world. Many are able to engage in spiritual pursuits for the first
time in their lives.
Some simply spend their later years in "productive contemplation."
In accordance with Eric Erikson's seventh stage in life, they
engage in a summing up period, making order out of life's experiences.
The retiree might gain new insights into his motivations. He often
mellows, is able to conquer residues of bitterness, jealousies
and resentment that may have poisoned his interactions with others.
He has the opportunity to grow as a person and sweeten his memories
as the perspective of time and self-knowledge gives him a new
outlook on his world.
Creativity is another spiritual means of
expression open to many older citizens. We all know some local
"Grandma Moses" type, an older person who discovers
hidden talent in art, music, drama or literature in his/her latter
years. Interestingly enough, emotional isolation frequently results
in creative activity and loneliness and loss are known to act
as an impetus for creative work. A person may be talented in art
or music, but only find the time to express these gifts after
retirement.
Creativity can also be expressed in community and charity activities.
Many people find fulfillment in "the need to be needed."
Today it is very common for the elderly to engage in volunteerism.
In fact, many institutions and projects would be unable to function
without the assistance of volunteer staff, including services
for the blind, retarded, chronically ill and social outcasts.
Hospitals also depend upon them.
Even the homebound or the ailing can make significant contributions
in many of these spheres. There are wheelchair-bound elderly who
give telephone support to the needy. Some roll bandages or pack
Meals-on-Wheels for others. There are frail older people who have
discovered the joys of spiritual growth; with the aid of tapes,
Internet, or videos they're learning new fields. Indoors gardening,
knitting, crocheting and drawing are all satisfying activities
that some handicapped elderly have developed despite their limitations.
One enterprising project is a video exchange
program between homebound elderly. The participants are filmed
describing an aspect of their previous work, some interesting
tidbit from their family history or a particular skill. This is
shown to another homebound elderly person, who reciprocates with
a video of his own. The tapes are circulated and widen the contact
and contribution of each participant. Today Internet allows the
homebound elderly to e-mail friends all over the world.
Perhaps the most significant "opportunity"
of old age is closest to home --devoting time to one's family.
Indeed studies show that many pensioners prefer developing this
aspect of their retirement, aiding their children with household
chores, advice and financial aid. Grandparenting is a profession
which has been sparsely documented, but which gives much joy to
its proponents. It is not rare for a former businessman to invest
time and ingenuity in building an airplane model, or playing the
drums with a grandson, something he regretfully did not have time
or patience to do with his own children.
Throughout the ages it was the task of the elderly in every society
to transmit the culture to the younger generation. The verse from
the Bible ("Ask your forefathers and they will tell you")
reflects this. The experience of the older generation can still
mold and guide the young; the grandparents, as role models, show
their offspring what is expected of them. In contrast to the parents,
grandparents are often less demanding, which enhances the interaction
between the generations and assures the transfer of values.
Today with the growth of the graying population
there is a new industry of Leisure Time exponents. People are
encouraged to develop hobbies and all kinds of busywork are recommended
to the elderly to "help pass the time" or "kill
time." How tragic those after years of study, growth, toil,
maturity and retirement, it all ends in "killing time."
Long life is not a goal in itself. The
goal has to be a quality of life; a reason to live which gives
a sense of meaning to aging. "Old age to the uninitiated
is winter; to the learned it is harvest."
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