A: It is comforting for a single mom to have her baby sleeping at her side, and equally comforting for a two-year-old. The problem is arranging for your son to sleep on his own. He has become accustomed to sleeping with you, and the transition to his own bed and room may be difficult.

If your son can sleep in a crib, explain to him that he is getting to be a big boy, tuck him in with hugs and kisses and a soft animal, leave a night-light on, and leave the room. He will cry. Let him cry for fifteen minutes or so, comfort him in his crib, and leave again, this time for a little longer. Continue to extend the time away until he realizes that you will not take him out, and he finally falls asleep in exhaustion. The next night will be much easier, and by the third night, he will undoubtedly get the idea.

It'll be a bit more difficult if your son can climb out of his crib, in which case, he should be on a low bed. You will have to gate his room so he can't come out, using double gates, with one gate on top of the other if he is able to climb over one gate. Again, reassure your son after crying, but don't take him out. Your persistence will be rewarded, and your son will adjust.

It's particularly important for you as a single woman to get your son out of your bed because if you should ever want a man to share your bed, your son would feel very rejected if he were to be displaced.

Dr. Sylvia Rimm,Phd

Copyright © 2000, Creators Syndicate, Inc.