In-Laws

Greg: There's nothing to talk about. My parents are expecting us to come to Boston this Christmas. My brother will be home from college, and my sister and her husband are coming in - it's going to be a whole family thing, it's going to be great! And you know how much we love Boston.

Marnie: Hold on, Greg. I haven't agreed to anything. My Mom will be all alone and I don't want to leave her for Christmas.

Greg: But we're with her all the time....

Marnie: Because she has nobody else here. How can I enjoy being with your family on Christmas knowing that she's all alone? Can you understand that?

Greg: No, I don't. It's not fair. Every holiday we'll have to spend with your mother because she's alone. We'll never see my family?

Marnie: Well, maybe we can visit your family some other time - not during the holidays - like for long weekends.

Greg: No way. The whole family's going to be there. You know that only happens on Christmas. And besides, it's going to be so special. You know my Mom. The second she finishes washing the Thanksgiving dishes, she starts cooking for Christmas. It's like she was born to do Christmas. My father even dresses up like Santa Claus. You want me to trade that for the two of us and your mother in her one bedroom condo? It'll be a very silent night.

Marnie: Greg, don't be so selfish. That's exactly why she needs us, so it won't be a silent night for her.

Greg: Doesn't she have any friends she can spend it with?

Marnie: Come on. You know all her close friends moved to Florida, and she's afraid of flying. What am I supposed to do? Put an elderly woman on a bus for twenty hours when her daughter is around the corner. It really kills me.

Greg: She's not that old. She's only fifty-five, not some helpless little old lady. Marnie, I married you, I didn't marry your mother. It's not fair that I have to be miserable for Christmas because you feel guilty about leaving her. I miss my family. Come on, Marnie, we'll have such a great time with them.

Marnie: Maybe you will, but I sure won't. I'll feel miserable leaving her alone.

Greg: Well how about if I speak to my parents about having her come to Boston with us?

Marnie: It won't work. She'll feel like she's intruding, like she's an outsider, just like I feel. We're different from your family. We're more reserved, and your family is so overwhelming, so opinionated about everything. We're not used to that kind of extreme... We're more private people. She doesn't like being in big crowds...

Greg: What are you really saying, Marnie? What do you mean you feel like an outsider?

Marnie: They don't really make me feel welcome. I always feel like a non-person when I'm around your family. Maybe that's why I don't want to bring my mother into that situation. She'll feel the same way that I do. For you, it's a warm, loving family. You're God to them...

Greg: What do you mean? My parents are always nice to you, okay maybe my sister...

Marnie: Is a bitch. But even your parents - they say all the right things but they've never really treated me like one of you. I'm not good enough for you. Remember, "Kapulski" was not exactly the name they wanted for their daughter-in-law.

Greg: Oh, that's bullshit!

Marnie: You think that's bullshit? Remember those aprons your mother gave me when we were still single? I'm surprised she didn't embroider on them, "Stay in the kitchen and take care of my son." She hates the fact that I have a career, especially since your sister, the controlling bitch, can't keep a job for more than a month because of her rotten personality. Face it, your family doesn't like me and I want to be with people who love me, especially at Christmas.

Greg: They never ever said anything bad to me about you.

Marnie: They don't have to say it, Greg. I can see it from the look in their faces, the look in their eyes, the way they talk to me. They've never accepted me..

Greg: So I've got to be miserable because you think my family can't stand you...

Marnie: So I've got to be miserable?

Greg: I don't like what you're saying. It's not right...

Marnie: I just knew this would happen one day...

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