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Once
I camped for a week on a beach in Greece.
A sleeping bag on the sand. One dress, one skirt and three shirts...that
was all of my gear.
My food: all served at the cafe. Turkish
coffee. Fresh goat yogurt with a sprinkle of sugar for lunch.
Grilled fish.
Neighbors
came out and waved goodbye. They thought we were moving.
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My company: Gents with accents.
My activity: Topless bathing. As much sun
as I could stand.
I was single. Reading seemed taxing.
It was only natural that when I had kids,
I thought my family would enjoy camping.
It took me years but finally I convinced
my husband to go camping with our four children who were then
all under the age of eight. I borrowed a tent and sleeping bags.
And then I started packing:
Tent, water bottles, clothes, diapers,
change of clothes, bathing suits, clothes for sun, clothes for
cold, mats, pillows, underwear, toothbrushes, pails, shovels,
mosquito repellent, suntan lotion, medical supplies, forks, knives,
hamburgers, cereal.
I even packed a nutcracker in case we found
walnuts in the woods.
You get the picture: I was prepared for
EVERY eventuality.
Kids do that to you.
I packed for 5 hours and 23 minutes
I was exhausted and we hadn't even left.
One of my husband's outstanding talents
is his mastery of spatial relations: He fit everything into the
car.
Neighbors came out and waved goodbye. They
thought we were moving.
The minute we started driving, the kids
were hungry. Ever notice how they save their hunger for when the
food's not readily available?
I fed them pretzels, chips, apples and
bagels that I had tucked in my food bag. But they were still hungry.
Then the real eating began. A contortionist, I reached from the
front seat all the way over into the back and pulled out salami
sandwiches, humus and olives.
We had gone through breakfast and lunch
before we were 15 minutes down the highway.
Husband wanted his coffee, which spilled
on my pants.
We drove for what seemed like ten hours.
I was soggy for all of them.
Nobody took a nap.
It began to drizzle as we pulled into the
campground.
We scouted the campground. It was nearly
empty. Babes in the woods, we couldn't believe our good fortune.
We found the perfect site, full of tall
trees with sweeping canopies.
We parked the car. We started unloading.
We spread out the tent, getting it ready
to erect. Then we realized there were no stakes or poles.
We had no idea of how to put it up.
Suddenly the sky cracked open and burst
into torrential rains. The kids ran around getting soaked.
We got back in the car and listened to
the radio between the bursts of thunder.
The news said the rain would last for three days.
"Didn't you listen to the weather
report?" I asked my husband.
"Didn't you?"
We grimaced at each other. We were ready
to fight. Then secretly we realized we were both relieved. We
wouldn't have to put up the tent.
We folded up the tent. We went back to
the mall. We went to the movies. We ate pizza. We went home.
I am happy to report that unpacking was
much quicker than packing.
Now when our family goes out for pizza
and a movie, my three-year-old is thrilled because he thinks we're
camping.
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