There are women who dread when their husband goes away on a business trip and those who applaud.

Most women do both.

The dreaders are the ones who can't fall asleep when their husband is away. They lock each door three times and then try the locks again before they go to sleep; they pull the curtains tightly closed. They sleep with a hammer in the night table.

Then there are the worriers. Vicky, the wife of an air traffic controller, says that when her husband goes away, in the middle of the night she wakes and worries that he has died and she's going to be a widow and be alone for the rest of her life. So she calls him at 4 a.m. cause she's terrified. In this way, she ruins the five days of scuba diving that help him unwind and handle his high pressure career.

Then there are wives like my friend Cindy. When her husband goes away, she immediately puts all of his clothes in his drawers and cleans all of his personal effects off of the dresser and night table. She puts all photographs with his face away. She has the space back to herself without a reminder of the man who occupies so many of her waking hours.

Renee, another friend, says that when her husband is away, she spreads out across the whole bed. Her husband doesn't like it when she eats in bed, so she eats all of her meals in bed, especially potato chips. She goes to sleep wearing socks, flannel pajamas and pounds of moisturizer. She stays up late reading, especially old love letters.

There are definite advantages when hubby is away. When better to feed the kids a diet of frozen pizza, cereal and hot dogs? When better to talk long distance on the phone for hours? When better to let the kids watch videos till they fall asleep in front of the TV?

Sonia, a psychologist, claims that when she's alone the house runs more smoothly. She's more efficient and organized. She doesn't have to wait for her husband to do whatever it is she's asked him to do and she doesn't have to clean up his stuff. She also has better control of the kids because she feels she is in charge. She feels that she can discipline more effectively.

In my experience though, there are always some major problems when hubby goes away.

Things break down, checks bounce, the car dies, the kids get sick, the computer won't work, the phone is disconnected, the refrigerator door won't close. All of these things have happened to me.

And I know why. I'm the kind of woman who enjoys my husband's absence. I like reading in bed without him telling me turn off the light. I like to dance to loud music without him telling me to turn down the music. I like to wear sweat pants and a sweatshirt for three days without him asking when I'm going to change my clothes. I like walking around with baby powder in my socks. I like washing my hair with mayonnaise. I like changing the furniture around.

I like a vacation from marriage.

So God sends us problems as a reminder: He makes sure to find something we don't want to deal with alone. Something that will make us wish our husbands were home. He makes sure that we do miss our husbands.

Yes, honey, I do miss you. I am counting the days. I don't like sleeping alone.

Hurry home. But not too fast.