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How Parents and Teens Can Talk to Each
Other
Part I: Parent to Teen
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Click
on the underlined text to view
our comments
on what's right or wrong with the letter
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The Wrong Way
Dear Gabriella,
Your father and I never see you any more. You don't
seem to want to have anything to do with the family.
I'm fed up with you staying out all weekend. As long
as you live here, young lady, you will abide by our
rules.
You will
be dressed decently and ready to go to your Grandma's
by 5:00 Sunday afternoon. I mean it!
Mom
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The Write Way
Dear Gabriella,
I know
that you're growing up and have your own circle of friends,
but I would also like to spend some time with you and
have you join us in things that we do as a family.
What
can you suggest?
I know that you usually like to
go out with your friends on Friday and Saturday nights,
maybe one of those evenings you'd like to be here? We
could send out for pizzas and rent some videos.
I'm not
saying that your Dad and I will join your group, just
that it would just be nice to have you and your friends
here.
This Sunday we have plans to go
to Grandma's for dinner.
Would
you come with us? She enjoys seeing you and you like
seeing her, too.
If these
suggestions don't work for you, I'd be open to your
ideas. Let's talk.
Lots of love,Mom
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Go to Part
II: Teen to Parent
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Use
at least several of the following principles when
you write your letter:
Don't be heavy
handed in your tone.Acknowledge that your teenager
is no longer a child.Invite her participation in a
dialogue.Suggest a solution; frame it as a request.Address
each other respectfully.
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Your Way
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