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Dear
Fa,
Over
the years, we have exchanged opinions on how to respect and care
for our bodies, tbe aware of the body, respect limitations, and
be on guard for injury.
Today
there is a strong emphasis on aerobic exercise, strength training
and flexibility for every age. A personal trainer at the neighborhood
gym believes that these three components are essential for healthy
living. Recently, he helped a ninety-year-old woman get stronger
with lifting weights twice a week and so he is convinced that
no matter what the age, anyone who really wants to and is disciplined
can make significant change. He is sure that this is one of the
ways of pursuing a vibrant active life.
Exercise
has been scientifically shown to release endorphins and so it
is a natural pick-me-up, enhancing self-esteem and giving an overall
good feeling. I guess one of my questions is, how much exercise?
How much of an effort does one make to stay in shape? How does
one remain at ease in one's aging body, a body that the pervasive
youth culture does not usually view as attractive?
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| How does one
remain at ease in one's aging body, a body that the pervasive
youth culture does not usually view as attractive? |
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A colleague
mentioned that he feels out of shape
and less attractive and that his age and looks are hurting him
professionally. He is debating some light cosmetic surgery to
improve his chances for a specific high power job. From his experience,
his age has been a negative factor in getting and keeping some
jobs.
Rachel,
a good friend, who originally came from Algeria, is in her sixties.
She recently commented that she always feels sexy and attractive,
and she couldn't care less about not conforming to the contemporary
definitions of beauty. She says that her legs are like piano legs,
thick and solid and she feels they are very grand. What Rachel
feels about herself comes through. There is a self-acceptance
that is attractive and appealing and ageless.
I am
curious as to where you stand. What do you think of cosmetic surgery,
of nips and tucks, of fighting against the inevitable? Has Chinese
philosophy influenced you in your approach to the body? What is
a natural way of aging? Is there more of an acceptance of the
natural way of aging?
Sincerely,
Felice
Dear Felice,
As a dancer and professional
who teaches exercise, I would answer your first question by saying
that exercise should be a part of one's life, like eating and
sleeping. It is basic for life. Exercise focuses on staying healthy,
on maintaining what there is. You are one total, you feel generally
better, the body stays alert and the mind is affected. Exercising
affects quality of life. If you stop exercising, you lose those
important gains.
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| Every
person should exercise age appropriately. A person of 60 should
not do what a 40 year old does. |
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Every person should exercise age
appropriately. A person of
60 should not do what a 40 year old does. I am against overly
strenuous aerobic exercise; the extreme jumping, the lack of feedback,
the possibility of injury can all be deleterious. I believe in
moderation. Another important thing to remember is to choose your
exercise according to your interest. Stretching and toning exercises,
yoga, swimming, tai-chi are all good choices. Otherwise it is
too hard to maintain exercise as an essential part of the weekly
calendar.
Aging is not only about gray hair
and the body hanging down; it is many things at once. Aging can
be about looking at your past, what you have built, the personal
achievements, the things you have learned and contributed and
what you can potentially contribute.
At the same time, aging can feel
lonely, depending on the context. If your context includes close
family and friends, part of aging is heartwarming. You celebrate
shared experiences. You radiate how you feel -- body language,
posture, and carriage are transmitted.
Your posture can radiate grace. Walk
as if an imaginary string is connected to the top of your head,
pulling you up, stretching and lifting yourself up. Don't feel
like a broken-down person. It sounds old-fashioned but I think
it is old wisdom that fits contemporary life. If you hold yourself
too closed, people feel a wall.
Here is an exercise to maintain supple
open movement. Any position is okay but standing -- which tones
the whole body, pumps blood circulation and makes you more alert
-- is ideal for this exercise. Slowly move the various joints
of your body. Circle, up and down, bend, stretch, focusing one
at a time on each of your joints from the toes up -- ankles, knees,
hips, waist, spine, chest, shoulders, elbows, wrists, fingers,
neck. Finally, squeeze the face towards the nose, stretching eyes
and mouth wide open towards the ears and relax. Take a deep breath
and let it go. It is good to do this a minimum of four times a
day.
Feel good; be more careful about
how you dress. Smile, stretch the face muscles -- taut muscles
make one look older and not receptive to the outside. If someone
thinks a little surgery will help, I am not opposed although one
should remember that it is only a temporary solution.
Regarding creams, although they are
recommended for the middle-aged woman, they are usually shown
on a twenty-year-old model!! Nonetheless, a good cream can temporarily
improve skin texture and contribute to a glowing look, as can
makeup.
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| You
radiate how you feel -- body language, posture, and carriage
are transmitted. |
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We are flooded by youth culture that
creates a dark feeling about aging. Aging is not only about suffering.
As a Chinese woman, I say, honor the changes. Accept and see yourself
as a whole. There are almost no representations in the media of
older, attractive people. Don't be influenced by that. Look inside
yourself and see your reflection; how you have lived and what
aging has brought with it. People turn to elders for advice, for
wisdom that comes from accumulated knowledge and experience. There
is a reflexive giving and receiving in life that keeps one vital.
Isn't this beauty?
Chinese philosophy is very foreign
to western society but perhaps people can benefit from the approach
that honors the elderly; as an elder one has more self- confidence,
more privileges. The young person has not yet contributed. Carry
yourself as a queen; see yourself as an elder, walk with dignity.
Sincerely,
Fa
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